There was a lot going on in the past weeks and the coming weeks will also be quite busy. Somehow this made me disappear in the daily routines. The important things get done, but many other projects that I have or want to start are neglected. It is some kind of survival-mode, delivering all the relevant stuff and trying to keep up with what needs attention. Otherwise I look for distraction, to get some distance to all the decisions I made or still need to make. Then less and less time remains for true calmness and reflection of my actions. Instead, an interplay establishes between making decisions and getting stuff done, followed by searching distractions and consuming stuff. I can feel how this interplay makes me more and more restless and starts to turn into an addiction. I slowly get to the conclusion that I cannot proceed like this and that I must break this dynamic.
As I am writing this I can observe on myself that freely writing down my thoughts like this is a good method to achieve just that. While writing I am active and at the same time reflecting my thoughts. Through the connection of a productive activity and the structuring of my thoughts I can calm down my mind a bit. That is also the value when maintaining a diary or daily logbook. A diary is on the list of things that I want to do, and I already did that for a few months during the winter. Sometime in spring the activity faded out, and since then not ansinge entry has been added. Now I slowly remember what value, what purpose the diary has. It is another thing that needs to be done daily, but it supports processing my experiences und focussing my thoughts on what is relevant. So it is worth the time and effort.
It happens so quickly that our intention to stay calm and well orientated gets thrown over by the demands of every day life. Then we limit our thinking to what is absolutely necessary, deliver on the duties that we chose previously, are always under tension, and need distraction to relax. That is a clear sign that time has come to calm down again. Visit nature without active cellphone, as often and as long as possible. Take a pen and paper, or a keyboard and a screen, and start writing down our thoughts. Writing has a very different quality when it is not combined with the intention to produce a good text, but simply serves to put down my thoughts. This work does not have its value in the product, but in the activity itself. The resulting text has already fulfilled its purpose when the mind has calmed down a bit while writing it.
We notice that the relaxation we buy with distraction does not really give us calmness. We continue to feel pushed. Lasting calmness is only possible when slowing down, taking time for ourselves. In nature, or in another peaceful environment. At some point we no longer need distraction to relax, or create distance to the stress for a few minutes. It becomes possible again to just take a moment and calm down, under my own power, in every situation.
In this calmness we find the strength to master our daily life. And not just that, we also find the strength to slowly transform our daily life, in a direction that gives us more joy. We see that we are developing, that things can be changed, and that give us new strength and motivation.